Monday, March 7, 2011

Of stone flowers..


Take another drag. Ok, ready? Vas-y!


Dragging.. a little, not too much.. keeping it in. Don't breathe out yet, don't cough. The trick is to breathe out before. I drag, blink, swallow dry, breathe in some more, hold my breath .. there, phew...

Do you feel anything?

Shaking my head no.

Ok, go again.. here .. vas-y!

Dragging.. a little .. same procedure.. breathing out, leaning back a little...Whoa! I feel like sliding down to the floor, unable to stand on my legs but don't. I get hold of the window sill, of the wall on the other side of the small bathroom.

I'll fall.. or am I? Out of the bathroom, gathering strength, moving my body with my will, willing myself onto the sofa. Long distance... phew.

I'll fall .. I'll fricking fall!! Grabbing onto the cushion.. or else.. Where are you? How can you be standing there, too far away, doing whatever?? Are you fucking kidding me?

Whoa! What the fuck is happening to me? The wall shows white flowers on white ground. And they are moving! Whoa..

That, child, is m. for you.

I thought I was resistant!

Resistant? That's what you thought, girl?! You laugh.

Come here, where are you? Come!! Finally. Sit next to me, come closer, CLOSER!!

One hand holding onto the cushion, my right hand clinging into you, squeezing your palm.

Let's go, let's eat, you must be hungry!

Hungry? Eat? What? Umm.. no..

I watch you eat, I can't. Your food is racing on your plate. Whoa..

There's something.. something.. needs to be done.. food.. prepare.. this .. in there..

What? I can't understand you.

Gestures.. saying no.. leave.. i t...

Moving my eyes is scary.. moving my head hurts .. talking's a miner's work. I don't, I...

You look at me.. you say... what did you say? What? Incomprehension galore.
Say again. I hear you, don't listen, don't remember. I wonder.. why?

Did I call you? Can't be, can't talk, can't force myself to walk. Hard work.. no way, no. NO!

You're standing beside me. Touch me! Kiss me.. touch.. hold... come here..

Eat something.. this later, you say. You think? Neah, forget. I pull you over, not letting go.. kiss me... Hungry eyes, mine. Hungry me, no.

I need you near. I'll fall if you go back, drown if your lips leave mine, if your hands take off.

You caress my cheek, the other. How does that feel? Intense? I nod, you caress, I feel.

My skin lusts for you, my self does. Persuasive. More.. skin.. touching .. mine ... you ... me ... feel ... quiver...

Closed curtains.

***

7 comments:

Anonymous said...

What a strange experience! Was it real or was it a trip or anything else?

saltyfish said...

are "real" and "a trip" mutually exclusive?

talldarkman said...

Another poem!

talldarkman

saltyfish said...

very much not!

talldarkman said...

hmm...read it again....needs explaining.....so classified as a poem. :(

it could be a dream.....or from the first sentences....first experience of some drug....i don't know if you smoke.

still...tangent.

talldarkman

saltyfish said...

I don't smoke (you know that) but there is something true in your second analysis :)

Anonymous said...

fly fly away........